Gays can adopt in Florida — overturning crazy 1977 prohibition

After yesterday’s ridiculous vote on the don’t ask/don’t tell scenario, this announcement below comes as a very welcome bit of news:

From the Tampa Tribune 9/22/10

Court affirms Florida ban on adoption by gays unconstitutional

The Associated Press
Florida will immediately stop enforcing its ban on adoptions by gay people following a decision by a state appeals court that the three-decade-old law is unconstitutional, Gov. Charlie Crist said today. (more…)

My not-so-married life

This month, September, in fact today, is the anniversary of my divorce. I’ve been divorced twice as long now as my marriage even lasted. And yet, I found myself thinking of my brief experience of being a married woman last night and again this morning. (more…)

Black and white and red all over

I know — it’s supposed to be “read” all over as in that old childhood joke — What’s black and white and read all over? A newspaper! But if you read this blog, you’ll have the context for why I’m writing it as red, not read.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the comments I received on this blog recently — questioning why I identified Sarasota’s new Police Chief as African American and why I felt it was important to comment about having a black individual in this role, particularly in Sarasota.

I answered some of the concerns in the comment section of that blog — you may want to check out readers’ and my comments here.

I do feel that sometimes, in a story, or in a discussion, a description of the people involved — their race, religious or political affiliation, their ethnicity, their socio-economic background, their marital status, even their sexual preferences — can be relevant and important and provide context.

In our culture right now what’s terribly, terribly missing nearly all the time is context. (more…)

Doug Holders says stay-at-home moms aren’t part of “workforce” … oh, no he dit’nt!

I already didn’t like Doug Holder — current State Representative District 70 — too much for his stance, voting, and wishy-washy statements on oil drilling off the coast of Florida, but now I like the guy even less. Holder is a holdover from the Mad Men era — apparently, the guy doesn’t have a clue the 60s are over.

During yesterday’s Sarasota Tiger Bay meeting, Holder had this to say about his challenger in the race for District 70 — Nancy Feehan:

“My opponent hasn’t been in the work force for 25 years.”

Oh, no, he dit’nt! (more…)

MC … Sarasota Smoothie Queen

If you read my July Cappuccino Chez MC column, you might recall that I’m slowly transitioning from outsourcing my meals to insourcing them. Meaning — yup, that’s right, I’ve got to feed myself at home!

My desire to transition is based on a lot of ideals — I don’t want to waste my time in always running out someplace in search of sustenance; I want to save money; I want to reduce my impact on my Earth by reducing my reliance on packaging and my use of fossil fuels expended in the going-after of things like early-morning coffee or mid-day smoothies; and I want to have more control over what ingredients are actually going into my body.

While my efforts might seem tortoise-like, my energy is increasing to rabbit-like levels. (more…)

Love between the raindrops

If you have no idea who you are anymore, try to recall a time when you did. When you knew who you were undeniably. When you moved with a sureness that came from presenting yourself in the truest way — whether people liked you or not, whether someone hired you or not, whether you could avoid an argument or not.

The you you were when belly-laughing was something that happened often. When seeing someone you cared about made you feel excited rather than obligated. When just being outside in the sun or in a coffee shop reading left you with the undeniable buzz of being alive.

A time when you thought and felt, hell, you knew, the whole world was at your feet. Your whole life was in front of you, figuratively or literally. (more…)

MC (and Coco) in da house

Clearing out a folder of photos and came across these. Just goes to show the fact that at least in 2008 and early 2009, I actually did get out of my house and into “da house!” (more…)

Heads up

I know, know for sure, I’m going to alienate some friends, family, maybe even a paramour or two with this blog.

But, HELLO!!? Can we please eat with our heads up? (more…)

Sarasota: nearly seventh heaven

Who knows, really, what that phrase means anyway? But whatever it is, I think I’m entering it.

Yup. Today is the first day of my seventh year back here in Sarasota — and also the beginning of my seventh year of being in business for myself.

When I left Boston six years ago, I really didn’t have any idea what was ahead for me. I just knew that the city I’d loved — and the man I’d loved in it — had kind of beat the stuffing out of my heart. It was time to leave. With no expectations beyond surviving and carving out a little life for me and my cats, I arrived in Sarasota at the height of humidity and with the skies fraught with the maelstrom that would be Charley.

I slept on the floor that night; furniture not yet arrived from Boston (and wouldn’t show up for another two weeks). Einstein and Coco weary from their 30-something hour sojourn.

I bitch a lot about Sarasota — my hometown, really, and that of my family — but I’ve grown to love it, warts and winds and wackadoodles, all.

I still haven’t reconciled myself to the superficiality of what passes for relationships in this town, though; — god how I’d love to have a real conversation with someone that didn’t become something regretted or ignored or discounted later. Every now and then someone speaks something really real — but then they quickly withdraw and it — whatever that real thing was — is never mentioned again. And that continues to trouble me. Everyone in this town keeps everyone else at a considerable arm’s length. People dance around their emotions here. In my experience, nobody really says what they really think. It’s hard to get to the real person. If I ever leave it will be for this reason. Oh, and rising sea levels.

But, there are some genuinely lovely, nice people in this town, too. Men and women with whom I’ve shared drinks and walks and kisses — I just wish I could say I knew any of them better. What makes their hearts beat. What makes their hearts skip a beat. What their fears are; what made them fall in love and what makes them think they’re falling out of love. What makes them feel as if they’re breaking into a million little pieces and how they somehow pick all those pieces up again and get back in the game. I know they do it. They just don’t talk about it.

Want to know what makes my million little pieces stick together? I went on a drive over the weekend and captured just a few of the parts of Sarasota that have become my heart’s glue. I think this is going to be my best year yet.

Circle Books -- one of the first places to sell my book!

The view from the pier under the Ringling Bridge.

The fairy at the intersection near Florida Studio Theatre.

The catcus garden in my yard. I planted one tiny cactus that first August and now there are probably ten or more offspring. I actually love these plants.

The quiet place in my yard where lizards lounge on the Buddha and the jade plant seems to know all.

The view from my yard, late in the evening; not yet night.

Fear and loathing in Sarasota

Last night, I worked a bit late, stopped for dinner, and then was going to head back into my office and do a bit more, but stopped first in the kitchen to cut up some roasted chicken I’d bought as a treat for my cats. I stood there for some time at the counter, cutting, looking out the big kitchen windows into the yard, watching the dusk-feeding cardinals at the feeder which hangs at the edge of the carport. Calm night. I was looking forward to going outside around 11 pm and watching the Perseid meteor shower.

I fed the cats, cleaned the kitty litter, and stepped out to the carport area to throw the trash in the garbage can.

As I reached the garbage can, a black man suddenly appeared beside the bushes (not sure if he’d come through them or been walking along them), but it scared me so much — completely startled me, he was only a few feet from me, I hadn’t heard him coming — it was in my yard very close to the door, and I just dropped the trash and ran inside. (more…)