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That slop-jawed, Birkenstock-wearing Reality Chick!

Back in the day (was it really less than a year ago?!) when I had my Reality Chick column appearing each week in print, I could be sure that whenever I invoked the words President Bush or my more favored name for him — Georgie-boy, I could be sure of getting lots and lots of not-so-fan mail. Here’s a column that summarized some of the responses from those salad days and allowed me my summary dismissal thereof.

Every week, I hear from more and more Pelican Press readers. Through reader correspondence, I’ve “met” World War II veterans, booksellers, politicians, librarians, architects, bird-lovers, written-word lovers, Republicans, Democrats, young office-workers, long-retired school-teachers, Washington DC-ers, Ohioans, County employees, and jet-setting bigwigs. Honestly, I’m humbled to think that Reality Chick is even part of someone’s weekly reading– whether they’ve dropped me a note or not.

Even the uncomplimentary messages – and there are plenty — are welcome. I’m often well-challenged by readers who are angry or disagree with what I write. For example, several readers have caused me to reconsider sarcasm and whether it’s an effective tool even when sparingly used. Readers have educated me about Sarasota, about themselves, about their lives. There’s a world of fascinating folks in this town … and beyond.

Of course, I always receive more mail when I invoke G.W.’s name (notice how I’m avoiding the ire-inspiring “Georgie-boy”?). When I recently wrote about his “let them use ERs” faux pas, I received an unprecedented barrage of angry e-mails – all except one of which were from men. I suggested to several readers that they submit a counterpoint piece to the editor. I’m hoping they do, and that the paper runs it. Maybe we’ll all learn something.

(For the record, I heard from just as many folks – men and women — who thought that particular column was necessary and well-done … and p.s., I’m sending those checks out straightaway.)

For those who described me collectively, and creatively I might add, as a “slop-jawed,” “Birkenstock-wearing,” “no-talent,” “card-carrying liberal,” … well, I plead guilty to quite liberal use of a quite full deck, and if you think I have no talent — um, yeah, well, whatever, dude. (I rest your case.)

As for slop-jawed, that reader has evidently witnessed me scarfing down a Sicilian-style slice on Osprey Avenue, so, what can I say?

About those Birkenstocks … sorry, I’m a high-heel kind of woman. But on second thought, if that reader meant to imply I’m a lesbian, heck, I’ll take that as a compliment.

All the lesbians I know of are gorgeous, sexy, funny, smart, and rich. And though I happen to not be a lesbian (dang, no wonder I’m broke, ugly, and as funny, smart and sexy as a two-by-four) the emails I’ve received from quite mad men are making Ellen DeGeneres look mighty fine.

One ticked off male reader told me I was “too immature” for a column of my own. I wish he’d tell that to all the Sarasota men who won’t date me precisely because I am too mature – chronologically for them, and intellectually for me. (Oh, come on, that’s a good one!)

Many male readers tell me they prefer it when I write “lite” (their spelling, not mine) and advise me to stop writing about politics and focus on humor, sunsets and kitty-cats, and what it’s like to be a single woman in Sarasota.

Well, there you go, boys. I think I just did just that.

(this column appeared in print in August 2007)

Posted on January 18th, 2009Comments RSS Feed
2 Responses to That slop-jawed, Birkenstock-wearing Reality Chick!
  1. That was YOU eating that siclian pizza MC????Oppps…….BTW where the hell do you get good pizza on Osprey?????Keep up the GREAT writing!

  2. I forgot an i again MC…Damn…..I love pizza and still can’t spell it!

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